


Tea for Two

by octopus_fool



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-06
Updated: 2016-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-12 03:28:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5650894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/octopus_fool/pseuds/octopus_fool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo and Bombur just want to want to have their tea and biscuits in peace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tea for Two

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wicked_wyvern](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wicked_wyvern/gifts).



“Teatime,” Bilbo announced, setting down two cups of tea, two plates and a large platter of biscuits.  
Bombur put aside the toy he had been carving and sniffed the air. His face lit up.

“That smells delicious,” he said quietly.

“That’s what you always say,” Bilbo replied with a grin as he sat down on the sofa beside Bombur. “I think you are just trying to flatter me.” He stretched his legs out towards the warmth of the fireplace and snuggled into the arm Bombur draped around him.

“Well, this does smell even more delicious than usual,” Bombur said, taking one of the biscuits and trying it. “And it tastes at least as good as…”

He was interrupted by a loud knock on the door. Bilbo groaned, leaning against Bombur even more heavily than before.

“You don’t have to go,” Bombur suggested, pulling Bilbo towards him protectively.

“I do,” Bilbo grumbled. “Ancient Shire tradition.”

“As ancient as the one that hobbits and dwarves shouldn’t share a bed?” Bombur asked, blinking innocently just as there was another knock.

“You have a point,” Bilbo agreed, “but perhaps it is one of the other company members. I did tell all of you that teatime is at four.”

“Or it is Lobelia,” Bombur said, his eyes widening at the mere thought. His first encounter with her had been unpleasant enough for him to never want to be in the same room as her again, but unfortunately, it hadn’t been the last he had seen of her. “Whoever that is is knocking and you told us that we didn’t need to knock.”

“May I remind you that you knocked all those years ago? Perhaps you aren’t the only dwarf with a basic understanding of manners after all, though if that is the case, most of the others did an impressive job of hiding it during the quest.” Bilbo finally got up.

“Don’t go,” Bombur whined. “It was so comfortable; just the two of us in front of the hearth. I don’t want to share your baking with anyone else either, or have you sitting on a different armchair to appear ‘proper’. At least wear your ring when trying to see who it is, that way you can still evade Lobelia if it really turns out to be her.”

Bilbo shifted his feet. “I think my fingers may be getting wider, or at least wearing the ring feels like more of a burden nowadays.”

Bombur was just about to reply when there was another series of sharp raps on the door, this time sounding suspiciously like an umbrella.  
“Bilbo Baggins! Open the door right this moment! I know you and your _dwarf_ are in there!”

“Oh. It really is her,” Bilbo said, letting himself fall back onto the sofa beside Bombur. “It is only a matter of time before she comes peaking into the windows.”

“She’ll have our heads,” Bombur groaned. “And I just wanted to spend a nice, quiet teatime with you.”

“Play dead,” Bilbo said in a low voice, tipping over his teacup and letting himself sag against Bombur’s shoulder. “She won’t dare come inside if she sees us like that. Everyone knows how much she wants Bag End and she’ll know exactly how it will look if she were the one to find us dead. We’ll have a nice, quiet afternoon while she pretends she was never here. And when it turns out we aren’t dead, well, she can’t blame us for taking a nap, can she?”

Bombur grinned and quickly let his arm dangle from the sofa and his mouth drop open. There were things far worse than pretending to play dead in front of a warm fire in a comfortable smial with Bilbo leaning on him.


End file.
